Feeling it today

uncertainty breeds fear
the unknown
makes you question
what’s the right thing
to do

when you’re not given
accurate information
or it’s being withheld
anxiety sets in

should i stay
or go
what would keep me
safe

over two weeks of
isolation
no end in sight
loneliness
a new way of life

the need
for human contact
growing stronger each day
all i need is
a hug

More Days Like This

Today was a perfect day. I need more days like this.

A Perfect Day

Morning slicing
No rush
Sunny and breezy
The wind in my hair
Ninety minutes of stretching and kneading
Melting into a Thai massage induced coma
A short walk through the familiar neighborhood
My favorite Penang curry by the lake
A bit too spicy this time,
But still delicious
Quick stop for some Thai snacks
Before heading to the pool
Water the perfect temperature for lounging
And catching up with not one,
But two friends
Sunkissed, heading back as the sun set
Showered and in our pj’s
Pizza, laughs, and Netflix
The perfect end to
A perfect day

Stress Relief

It’s that time of the year where the stress has built up. It’s been almost 12 weeks since we came back from Christmas break, and we are all in need of a holiday. After school, I was frustrated. My typical response to frustration or a stressful day would be to come home, stew about it, veg out on the couch watching Netflix and eating junk food, feeling sorry for myself. But today I chose a different response. I chose to honor my commitment to the gym despite feeling cruddy.

grumpiness started
to make itself at home
the chocolate chip cookie
doing little
to stave off the feeling of frustration
dreams of the couch
coming to my rescue
played in my head

but I have an appointment
do I cancel? or do I go?
begrudgingly i went
convinced I’d do my thirty minutes
and leave

the beat started off slow
then sped up
motivating me to row
faster than normal
picking up speed
with each passing minute

endorphins taking over
the stress started to thaw
my training session
over too fast
but i was ready
for more

Breathing a Sigh of Relief

Months of preparation

Countless hours of rehearsals

Making sure everything is just right

Stress and worry taking its toll

Will they remember their lines?

Will they get the timings right?

Will the audience be impressed?

Performance day is finally here

Sweating and pacing as the audience arrives

Did I remember to put deodorant on today?

Finding my seat, it’s time to begin

With each performance, my shoulders relax a bit more

All that practice was worth it

Everyone is doing their best

The audience seems to like it

The finale is up next

Will they pull it off?

This was always the shakiest part in rehearsals

They did it!

The audience is clapping and cheering

We all breathe a huge sigh of relief

It’s over

We made it

Happy and smiling after the show. Parents were so impressed and excited about the students’ performance today!

On Photography #sol18

As an avid traveler, photography is one of my budding hobbies. I haven’t taken a class (I probably should ) and I don’t really know what I’m doing, but I try. That’s what counts, right? 🙂 Today, as I swiped through the photos I’ve taken so far on my trip, I’ve been thinking about me as a photographer.

On Photography

At first
center it
point and click
snap, snap, snap
quantity over quality

Through the years
I’ve evolved
no longer
am I satisfied
with mediocre

Now my photos
have to
tell a story
make the viewer
wonder and
question

The focus now
is less
on the famous
or touristy
and more
on the ordinary

Catching glimpses of
everyday life
made interesting
by the angle
the framing
and the focus

Color and
lines
grab my eye
intriguing me
enticing me
to take the shot

The goal to
get the perfect shot
the right angle
subjects in and
out of focus
framing it just so
better than editing later

More concerned with
quality over quantity now
many shots
don’t make the cut
but the ones
that do
are just right

Here are a few of my favorite shots:

The Countdown is On #sol18

The Countdown is On

One more day
just one
until
Spring Break is here
The words
that make
every teacher
around the world
jump for joy
do a little jig
high five everyone they see

One more day
just one
until
I’m packing my bags
carefully selecting the
perfect outfits
for my two trips-
one for work and
one for play

One more day
just one
until
the weight of the
term is lifted
just for a bit
and I can breathe a
sigh of relief

Just over a day
until
I’m boarding the plane
for country number
thirty-six

Singapore
here I come
in just
one more day

What I Believe #sol18

This is my second attempt at a What I Believe poem. My first is here.

What I Believe

I believe kindness always wins.
I believe people change and grow– sometimes together, sometimes apart. Both are okay.
I believe we have to be our own biggest cheerleader.
I believe our words reveal who we are inside.
I believe everyone should travel to a new place alone– at least once in their lifetime.
I believe a home-cooked meal is love.
I believe we are all a little too hard on ourselves.
I believe everyone is a writer, but many of us just don’t know it yet.
I believe eating plants gives us energy.
I believe I wasn’t meant to live life in one place.
I believe in saying thank you.
I believe in finding someone who complements us rather than completes us– we need to be whole on our own.
I believe in hard work.
I believe disconnecting is good for the soul.
I believe in doing what makes your heart happy.
I believe in taking risks– we don’t grow in our comfort zones.
I believe in second chances.
I believe a beach, a good book, and no agenda make for a perfect day.
I believe we learn from kids more than they learn from us.
I believe in saying sorry when we mess up.
I believe everyone should keep a writer’s notebook to capture their thoughts– you’ll thank yourself one day.
I believe we all have slumps, but we can’t allow ourselves to stay there forever.
I believe listening– truly listening to someone– is a lost art, and if you find someone who does, you should hold onto them.
I believe smoothie bowls are life.
I believe in investing in your own health.
I believe how people react to situations says more about how they’re feeling than anything else.
I believe everyone is beautiful– it’s our job to find their beauty rather than their flaws.
I believe you don’t truly appreciate your family until you’re older.
I believe in making people laugh.
I believe telling our stories is how we share our lives with one another.

Numb

People in pain
My people
Why can’t I take it
away?
It can take them
away

My mind reeling
When will it
stop?
Everything is fine
Until it’s not
And then what?
Am I supposed to just
pretend that life is okay
even when it
most certainly is not?

Not able to write
Unable to do much
of anything
Numbness takes over
to block out the pain
But it comes back
in waves
when I least expect it
Sadness, anger, disbelief
Fear, worry, dread

That age-old question
surfaces
Why do bad things
happen to good people?
I wish I knew

Life is a series of
ups and downs
I know that
But the downs
shouldn’t be this bad,
right?

For now, I don’t know
what to do
what to say
how to act
But I can show them I love them
be a listening ear
love them through it
That’s all I can do
I hope it’s enough

 

Drowning in Slices

Swimming in a sea of slices

circling, swirling, so many to choose from

unable to settle on just one

drowning, quite literally, in slices

 

Do I write about my trip to the movies this weekend

to see Beauty and the Beast?

Acutely aware of how un-handicap accessible

the theater was

precariously hobbling

stairs upon stairs

but oh, so worth it

 

Or what about the twins,

who are finally breaking free of

their shells?

Come play with me!

Constructing a teetering tower,

laughter flowing, as the blocks cascade down

Our private glances,

telling each other stories,

words not needed

 

How about the thrill of a new book?

Settling in to read, yet

unable to keep my eyes open

Zzzzzzzzzzz…

(In case you didn’t know,

Zzzzzz means sleep!

according to J.J.,

my dormant EAL student,

who just today made a connection

between our letter of the week and

Goodnight, Goodnight Construction Site)

 

Or do I tell you of the (mostly) unsuccessful attempts

to reheat last night’s leftover lasagna

in a small pot on a hot plate

while standing on one foot?

Oh the joys of not having

a microwave, or oven for that matter

 

Or better yet,

I could pine my notebook

teeming with stories not yet written

sifting through the ideas

until I found the perfect one

 

Drowning in slices,

this poem will have to do.

 

Thai Names

Don’t you just hate when everyone has your name? In a sea of Johns or Jennifers, you become defined by your last initial. Well, no more! I have a solution for you! For all of you expectant parents out there, here are some quirky and unique names for you to choose from, courtesy of Thailand!

There’s Einstein and Atom, Mafia and Boss,

Sibling pairs like Versailles and Venice, Violin and Piano,

Classics such as Cheese and Milk, Bike and Book, or

Stand-outs like Plankton, Bouquet, Touch, and Titi,

You can be Famous, the Best, a Bonus, or just Wow Wow!

You can be a Party or you can be Mild, cold as Ice or a Saint,

Then there’s First and Third, or simply Nine.

You can be a Proud Captain or you can be a Fluke.

Or you can be the most polite kid around and be Thankyou.

Whatever you choose, know that you hang the Sun over the Earth!

***********************************************************************

Living in Thailand has its idiosyncrasies, as every place does. I embrace its vibrancy and quirkiness. One of the things that I find so different than other places I’ve lived, so uniquely Thai, is the names people have. I’m not talking about their names in Thai, most of which consist of 23 letters and are unpronounceable to me. What I’m referring to are the English names they choose for their children. Some may say they’re unusual, others may say they’re weird. I’m going to go with quirky.