Tag Archives: living abroad

Stuck in a Korean “Covid Jail”

“You have to stay here,” the woman in the hazmat suit said.

“But I need to catch my connecting flight to Jeju, where I live. It leaves in two hours. I can’t stay here,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady and show that I was in control of my emotions, which I most certainly was not.

“No. You stay in Seoul. PCR test.”

“But, I have a negative PCR test result from America that I took before boarding the plane. I will take the PCR when I land in Jeju.”

“No. You cannot go to Jeju. Stay here.”

End of discussion. No more bargaining. I was taken to a cubicle by another hazmat-suited worker, where I would remain for the better part of two hours. I was given a new mask to wear, one that had two thick rubber bands to hold it in place and cut into my face, leaving marks. No water. No food. No access to a toilet. I was contaminated in their eyes. Someone to avoid, less I give them my germs, the ones that might contain Covid.

As I sat in my isolation chamber, becoming more and more restless and agitated as the time slowly ticked by, I called my boss, my friend, and my parents to tell them what happened and try to make sense of what would happen next. I called Korean Air to inform them of my detainment and inability to make my connecting flight, which I then lost.

After what felt like ages, I was finally given more information. I would be given a PCR test, taken to retrieve my luggage, and then take a bus to a temporary quarantine facility, where I would wait until my results came back. If I tested negative, I would be allowed to rebook my flight to Jeju, where I would be able to spend my 10-day quarantine in my own home. But if I tested positive, I would be sent to another quarantine facility outside of Seoul, where I would quarantine until I was told I could leave. Things weren’t looking good for me.

A little while later, I was escorted, along with a few other pariahs, along a corridor, down the elevator, and outside, into below freezing weather, to wait in line for what can only be described as the most invasive and painful PCR test I’ve ever had.

After getting off the bus at the quarantine facility, I struggled with my three large bags, as the hazmat suits stared at me, offering no help at all. To say the facility was depressing doesn’t do it justice. I walked down the fluorescent-lit hallway to my room, dragging my bags behind me. The door to my room opened onto a small “holding area,” beyond which was another door. My room was sparse, containing a twin-sized bed with a hard mattress wrapped in unclean plastic, a bedside table, a table and two chairs, a TV on a stand, a small fan, a wardrobe, a mini-fridge, and a landline phone. I had a basic private bathroom with a shower, a lone hand towel, and no soap (I’m in here due to Covid, yet I can’t wash my hands…the irony!). Luckily the wardrobe had a blanket and a pillow, so I didn’t have to lay on the plastic-wrapped mattress. I was shocked to find that the facility did not have wifi access, but I was lucky that I live in Korea so that I was able to use the data on my phone.

The only towel I was given. This was to dry off after my shower, too.

I was told the wait would be 8-10 hours. After a 15-hour flight, several hours in the airport, and the stress of the day, I tried to get some sleep. I was awoken abruptly around 2:00am by a gruff hazmat suit who stormed into my room without so much as a knock. In Korean, I was directed to sit at the table. For the record, I don’t speak Korean, but I figured it out using context clues and body language. A laminated paper was placed in front of me informing me that I had tested positive for Covid. Tears came to my eyes, fear and dread setting in. But I’m not even sick, I thought. I picked up the paper to read more information about what would happen to me next, but hazmat suit snatched it from my hands, barking, “No touch!”

The instructions said that I would be taken by ambulance in the morning to another facility in another (undisclosed) city for my quarantine. I was to take my luggage, but prior to leaving, I was to pack everything I would use in the next facility separately, as all of my personal belongings used at the facility would be incinerated upon my departure and any electronics would likely be damaged during the cleaning and disinfecting process. I would be responsible for all of the costs for the government quarantine, but no amount was given, as it would depend on the number of days I had to remain there.

The reality of the situation set in, and I couldn’t hold back my tears, as anger, frustration, and fear pulsed through me. My worst nightmare had come true. I’d heard about this happening, and I knew it was a risk for me to have traveled home for Christmas, but I hadn’t thought it would actually happen to me. I begged hazmat suit to let me out. I’d quarantine at home, I promised. “You can put an ankle monitor on me if you want. I won’t leave my house at all.” Every request was met with an uncaring “NO!” which only left me spinning out of control. I wasn’t even sick! I had a little bit of a stuffy nose, but that was it. Surely I’m not a danger to society. “Can I see my PCR result?” I asked through my tears, unsure how i could have tested positive after testing negative on twelve rapid antigen tests and three PCRs back home. Like every other request, it was denied. No amount of pleading changed her mind. Getting tired of my emotional response, she left.

I crumpled. Ripping off the mask, I sobbed, realizing that no matter what, this was my fate. It didn’t make sense. It wasn’t rational. And the sense of injustice I felt couldn’t be squashed. The heat in the room didn’t help the situation either. Hot air blew into the room, making it nearly unbearable. I knew it was -11C outside, but I needed to crack a window. Damn! The windows were bolted shut. Probably to prevent an escape, I thought.

Look carefully at the flags…

After calling everyone (parents, friends, boss) to alert them to my predicament, I collapsed on the bed, mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted. A few hours later, I was awoken again by my breakfast delivery, a ham and cheese sandwich and bottle of orange juice, along with two small bottles of water. I’m a vegetarian, which I told them when I was detained. No dietary accommodations were made here, they said. Orange juice, it is! Luckily I had a few snacks in my bag that I’d brought from Texas. Mostly cookies, chips, and candy, but hey, it was something.

That first day I was a fighter, doing everything in my power to get myself out of there. The ladies on the other end of my landline got so tired of me calling that they mostly just hung up whenever they heard my voice. The US Embassy tried to help, but they couldn’t make any headway either. As the day progressed, I realized I was stuck.

Lunch and dinner were the same, white rice with some sort of fried meat, kimchi, and three pickle slices. I ate the rice and pickles.

Due to a lack of space at the other facilities, I ended up staying there for four days. Without wifi, and not wanting to drain my data in case I needed it later, I was bored. I watched reruns of old crime shows, like CSI and Law and Order, that played on one of the three English channels. But mostly I slept. The heat was unbearable, and despite the small fan and lack of clothing (I only wore a tank top and pair of sleep shorts), I was burning up. I didn’t have a fever though. My thrice daily temperature checks I had to do confirmed that. After my numerous complaints about the heat and requests to turn it down, one of the hazmat suits brought me a large ice pack, which I would use to cool my body, moving it from my head to my torso to my feet. It helped some.

The days dragged on, and I felt like I’d never be free from that prison. On day four, I was notified that I would be transported to the new facility. My own hazmat suit, gloves, new mask, face shield, and booties arrived with my morning delivery. This is what I was to wear in the ambulance.

I couldn’t even pretend to smile…

To be continued…

Take a Peek Inside my Korean Home

Living abroad means I move every few years to a new country. Each of my homes has been different, each with their own unique aspects. My home in Korea has been the first place I’ve lived abroad that I didn’t choose. Some international schools provide housing and assign you to an apartment or house, while others give a housing stipend and you get to choose your own place.

In Jeju, I live in a townhouse near my school, about a 5-minute drive or 15-minute walk away. My house is two stories, with three bedrooms and two bathrooms. It’s cozy and small, but it’s enough room for me. I spend most of my time in the living room, surrounded by my plants and artwork I’ve collected while traveling. My kitchen is way too small for someone who loves to entertain, and it’s the thing I’d change the most if I could. I’d also love to build a deck in the backyard, but it’s really expensive to have one built ($4,000 USD for a deck that’s only 10 square meters!).

My bedroom has an en-suite with a small bathtub, which I enjoy soaking in when I’ve had a rough day or when my back’s giving me trouble. The theme of my bedroom is Moroccan, with a blue and white color palette, and I’ve decorated with photos I took on my trip to Morocco and the antique wedding blanket I bought.

The largest guest room’s theme is travel, specifically from my time in Myanmar, one of my favorite places I’ve ever visited. I’ve decorated the room with photos taken in Inle Lake and a few other pieces I bought while in Mandalay. My map duvet cover completes the travel theme.

I’ve started converting the smallest guest room into my “Zen room,” but I’m not quite done. I’d like for the room to be a place to meditate, exercise, and chill.

I didn’t really have room anywhere for my desk that I brought from Indonesia, but I love it and didn’t want to get rid of it. I eventually settled on housing it in the hallway upstairs, where I can get some natural light.

My home isn’t perfect, and there are things I’d change if I could, but I’ve done my best to make it a home. That’s one thing I’ve learned while living abroad. If you treat your house like a temporary place and don’t add your personal touches to it, you never quite feel settled.

What do you love about your home?

Spring Break Plans

Everyone’s all a buzz at school about what they’re planning to do for spring break. It’s not for another three and a half weeks, but for the first time since the pandemic began, we can actually travel with little to no restrictions. It’s definitely cause to celebrate! We are allowed to leave the country, as long as we get the required PCR tests and re-entry permits, with no quarantine upon our return. Many teachers are going to Vietnam, Thailand, or Singapore. We are also now allowed to travel to the mainland (South Korea) for the whole week without a PCR test upon our return. During previous holidays, school has only allowed us to go for a few days without a PCR test (and I avoid those things like the plague…in Korea, they are incredibly painful!).

While I’d love to travel somewhere outside of Korea, preferably Thailand, I’m going to play it safe this holiday. I don’t want to risk testing positive on a PCR (I’ve had Covid and you can test positive for a while after) and/or not be able to get back into the country for some reason. I’m looking forward to traveling back home and to England this summer though!

I’m excited to spend half the week in Seoul and the rest of the time here in Jeju. I’ll fly up on Sunday and stay Sunday and Monday nights at the Grand InterContinental Parnas hotel in an area called COEX in the Gangnam district. It’s an area I visit often when I’m in Seoul, so I know how to get around easily. I’ll eat at some of my favorite restaurants, Paulie’s Pizza (it’s just like pizza back home!), Egg Slut (yes, the name is awful, but this breakfast chain from LA is delicious), and Cafe Mama’s (a Korean cafe with the yummiest ricotta salad). I’ll also partake in some shopping at the COEX mall, where I can find some of my favorite shops that we don’t have here, like H&M and ZARA. I’m also looking forward to going back to my favorite salon, Juno Hair, where they treat you like royalty.

I’ll then move to the Grand Hyatt Seoul hotel in Itaewon, a trendy neighborhood in Seoul, for Tuesday and Wednesday nights. A couple of my friends are also going to be there, so we’ll have lots of fun walking the artsy streets and alleyways, shopping in boutiques and art shops, and eating at new restaurants. I love Plant Cafe Seoul, which is a vegan restaurant tucked away in Itaewon. I’ll do my best to persuade them to go with me. There’s also The Original Pancake House, which is like stepping into an American breakfast diner. One of my favorite night spots is a tiny place called Apt (for apartment). It’s got a really chill vibe, with old school jazz music and velvet couches, and the cocktails are top quality. I haven’t drank any alcohol in a long time, so I’ll have to see if they’ll make me a mocktail. While I’m staying at the hotel, I’ll probably try to squeeze in a relaxing massage too.

For the latter part of the week, I’ll be back in Jeju, where the weather has just started to be perfect. I haven’t made any plans yet, but I’m thinking a staycation on the west side of the island, a place I haven’t explored much yet, is in order. Since it’s not a Korean holiday, things are cheap and can be booked at the last minute, so I’ll probably play it by ear.

Here are a few pictures of Seoul from previous trips. Let’s see what I get up to this time!

Unique Things About Korean Housing

This afternoon as I was looking up possible housing options online for next year, I started thinking about all the differences between Korean housing (houses, townhouses, apartments) and those back home in the states. Quite frankly, some of these differences are also unlike other places I’ve lived (China, Albania, Thailand, and Indonesia).

First off, the rental pricing structure and high costs would put most Americans off. The prices are quoted in yearly rental prices, and must be paid in one-year increments before you move in. My budget, allocated by my school, is 18 million Korean won per year (~14,600 USD). Many places I found online today were in the 24 – 60 million range (19,400 – 48,500 USD). I wonder if there are other, more affordable options to be found. Navigating the site in Korean was really tricky, so hopefully I can get a Korean friend to help me. In addition to paying a year’s rent up front, you also have to pay a hefty deposit in advance. The deposit is at least the yearly rent, but many of the rentals I saw online had larger deposits. For example, a place I liked was 30 million won a year plus a 48 million won deposit. That means you’d be paying 63,000 USD up front!

All Korean houses are unlocked by a keypad on the front door rather than a key. My door also talks to me in a British accent, which cracks up everyone who comes over. I love not having to carry keys, but it’s a pain when I come home and the batteries on my door have run out. It’s only happened twice, but it’s weird that there’s no warning that the battery is low before it runs out. The only way to get back in is to “jump” the battery with a 9-volt. I’ve taken to carrying one around in my car just in case.

One of the nicest things about Korean houses is the under floor heating in the winter. Under floor heating is a radiant kind of heat, much different than the heating systems that blow out hot air. The only thing that’s tough is trying to find the right temperature at night, as your bed can get too hot from the floor heating.

As you may know, it’s customary to remove your shoes in Asian homes, a tradition I fully embrace now. The entryway is lower than the rest of the floor in the house and tiled in a different material. There are also cupboards in the entryway to store our shoes away, which is really convenient.

The windows are versatile. They are double-glazed and open two different ways. You can open them completely (inward like a door opens) or just a crack them a little at an angle (from the top) to let the breeze in and keep the rain mostly out. There are screens on each window that can be pulled up or down. With the spring and fall weather being so perfect, I utilize the angled windows often.

Lastly, due to the smaller size of the houses/apartments, there are a few appliances that do double-duty and save space. We have washer/dryer combos, which you can find in some smaller places in other countries too. The microwave and oven are one machine, which always confuses me since I can put metal in the microwave; it feels so wrong to do that. I sure wish we had dishwashers, because I despise doing dishes, but the large, deep sink with a removable drying rack is a compromise (I guess!).

Is there anything unique about homes where you live?

Can it be true? I sure hope so!

Since moving to South Korea in the summer of 2020, there’s been a mandatory quarantine. At first, it was a 14-day quarantine, which meant I stayed here for a year and a half to avoid the isolation. Then, in November 2021, the government dangled a carrot in front of us by saying that anyone fully vaccinated in Korea (which I am) can be exempt from the mandatory quarantine. There were still lots of hoops to jump through, but we were all excited and I booked my flights home for the holidays. Then, shortly before the Christmas holiday was set to begin, they reinstated the mandatory quarantine, only this time it was reduced to 10 days. While it was a pain (and a shit ton of money…3500 USD!) to change my flights, I was able to go home for about a week and a half. Sometime last month the quarantine was further reduced to 7 days, giving us a little more hope.

However, this afternoon, we received very good news in our inbox! The Korean government just released that they are ending the mandatory quarantine period for all fully vaccinated and boosted travelers (even if vaxxed outside of Korea, as long as you go through the process of registering your vaccination with their app). This goes into effect for people vaccinated in Korea on 21 March and for everyone else on 1 April.

While everyone’s pumped about the news, myself included, I can’t help but be skeptical about it. It’s like the boy who cried wolf…they told us once before and changed their mind, they can do it again. For now, I’m not booking any international flights, but it does give me hope for the summer break. I was planning on leaving anyway, but was concerned about the short break with having to factor in quarantine. If I can avoid it, I get more time with my family, which is what I want.

Fingers crossed that it sticks this time!

Driving in Korea

It wasn’t until moving to Korea that I owned a car as an expat. Everywhere else I’ve lived has been a major city with easy access to public transportation, such as subways or metros, taxis, motorcycle taxis, and buses. I’ve also always used a bicycle as a major form of transport or walked where I needed to go. When I moved to Jeju island in 2020, it was obvious that I’d need a car to get around, as taxis are quite limited, buses run infrequently, and I live in a pretty rural area, so bikes and walking aren’t the ideal form of transport for most places I need to go.

For the most part, I like driving here, and I appreciate the freedom it affords me. No waiting around for a taxi, spending hours changing trains and walking long distances to get where I want to go, or having to plan my outings so meticulously. But there are some definite differences in driving here as compared to the US- some I’ve gotten used to and some that continue to frustrate me.

If you like to drive fast, you’ll be so irritated here! The maximum speed limit anywhere on Jeju is 80 km/hr, which is only about 50 mph. Can you imagine only being able to drive 50 mph on the highway?!? You might be thinking…yeah, but I’d just risk it and speed. Well, while there are no police cars virtually anywhere, nor have I ever once seen anyone pulled over for any reason, there are speed limit cameras EVERYWHERE. I’m serious…my car talks to me all the time to warn me about upcoming speed limit cameras and beeps incessantly while turning my music all the way down if I am over the limit (which is in itself a very annoying feature that cannot be turned off!). The only good thing is that you are warned about the cameras. The most annoying thing about the speed limits on the highways is that instead of a few speed cameras along the way, which would mean you could at least go faster when you are not near a camera, there’s this thing called a “boxed camera zone” in which you must maintain an average speed of 80 km/hr over a long stretch of road. Again, my car comes in handy by telling me the average speed I’m going, but if I’m even 1 km over the limit, the loud beeping starts and my tunes cut out, forcing me to slow down so that I can hear my music. There are cameras at the beginning and end of the zone which take your picture. If you are too fast (it’s based on time stamps from when you enter and exit), you get a speeding ticket in the mail. I frequently see people who’ve sped past me earlier pulled over on the shoulder just before the exit to wait so they don’t get a ticket. It’s bizarre! One last thing about speed limits…all school zones have a 30 km/hr limit (18 mph). It doesn’t matter what time of day or night, what day of the week it is, or if it’s a school holiday, you have to adhere to the speed limit or you’ll get a ticket.

Another tactic to reduce people’s speed is to install speed bumps on nearly all roads, even major thoroughfares. Whereas in the States, you only encounter speed bumps in parking lots, near school zones, at airports, and in some residential areas, here in Jeju, speed bumps are a way of life, popping up every few hundred meters on most roads. This means that I get to hear my car tell me “speed bump ahead” all the bloody time.

Everywhere you go people complain about other drivers and say they have the worst drivers, and while I’m not going to make that claim, I can say that Korean drivers are very selfish. They will cut you off, block the road and refuse to move, pull right out in front of you, even when you have the right of way, and take ages to park while you are stuck waiting on them (nearly all Koreans back into all parking spaces, which always takes more time). When you honk at them to signal your frustration, which I do (yet most others don’t, which I find really odd), you get what I call the ‘Korean car apology.’ They turn on their hazard lights in a half-hearted attempt to acknowledge they were in the wrong. Don’t tell me your sorry by flashing your lights, just don’t drive like an asshole! The thing that confuses me the most about the selfishness of the drivers is that it’s in complete contrast to how Koreans behave in any other setting. Koreans are the most polite people ever, always giving to others, using the best manners, and bowing out of respect to everyone. So to drive like they are the only ones on the road is a mystery to me!

The one exception to the selfish drivers rule is roundabouts. Now I know we don’t have many roundabouts in the US (although I think they are becoming increasingly popular), most drivers understand the basic premise of how to use them. When you come to a roundabout, you yield to the cars that are in the roundabout. Simple, right? Well, not in Korea. In Korea, they do the exact opposite. They drive as if the person entering the roundabout has the right of way. It’s a frequent occurrence for a car to come to a complete stop in the middle of the roundabout to let loads of other cars in, sometimes causing a traffic jam in the roundabout, which is what a roundabout is designed to prevent! Another common action is to barrel into the roundabout without even slowing down, regardless of if there are other cars in the way, and expect the cars in the roundabout to stop for you. Blaring the horn does little to deter this unwanted behavior.

Driving in another country is always an adventure, and while driving in Korea has its share of frustrations, I enjoy that I can go on little adventures around this beautiful island I call home. Have you ever encountered any odd driving rules or habits in other countries?

Disclaimer: I have only driven in Jeju, and while it’s in Korea, I’m not sure if these problems exist in all of Korea or if they are specific to Jeju.

Year in Photos 2021

A tradition I start years ago on the SOL challenge was to reflect on the past year through photos (no captions, in chronological order). The idea came from Jeeyoung, a fellow slicer, and once I saw hers, I was hooked on the idea! You can have a look at the past years here- 2020, 2019, 2018, 2017, 2016, and 2015.

As an international school educator, I often travel to different countries several times a year, which is reflected in my Year in Photos. Due to the pandemic, 2021 will be my first year in photos with only two places represented- South Korea and United States. I was lucky to be able to get home for a few days this Christmas break, after a year and a half away from family. Despite not being able to travel as I normally do, I am blessed to live on a wonderful and safe island, Jeju-do, and have come away relatively unscathed from the pandemic. With that, here is my year in photos.

The Dream Tower is My Happy Place

Everyone who knows me here in Jeju knows that I love the Dream Tower. I’m such a regular there, that I’m frequently greeted by name whenever I visit. I love staying overnight, but I also enjoy just spending a few hours there, too. For those of you not in Jeju, the Dream Tower is the name of Grand Hyatt in Jeju City, which opened a little over a year ago. It’s a beautiful hotel in the heart of the city and the tallest building on the entire island by far at 38 floors (but I think it’s got to be actually taller than that since many of the lower levels have incredibly high ceilings). There are 14 food and beverage outlets, which gives me plenty of options, plus an incredible spa.

If you’ve read my slices this week, you’ll know I’ve been rather stressed with the Covid situation at my school, as more and more teachers and students are testing positive. After such a hectic week, I knew I needed to find a way to relax today and take some time to recharge my batteries. The Dream Tower to the rescue!

Bec and Michelle were already going to the city for a check up at the doctor, so we made plans to meet up for lunch. After a few back and forth texts, we finally settled on Yumeyama, the Japanese restaurant. It’s great at lunchtime, as they have several lunch sets to choose from, with lots of little side dishes, tea, and dessert included. Each of us chose a different set, but we all loved our choices. I, of course, had the tempura rice bowl, and it was delish! Being able to catch up on life, tell stories, and laugh was good for the soul. So often at school, we pass one another quickly and only really get to chat about work, so it was lovely to be able to have a leisurely lunch together.

After lunch, they left to go shopping at E-Mart for the week’s groceries, while I stayed at the Dream Tower in relaxation mode. Needing to kill an hour before my massage, I hung out in the lobby cafe, where I sipped on Jeju tangerine tea and read my book club book that I’m behind on (we are meeting this Wednesday, so I need to read a lot this weekend).

One of my favorite indulgences is a foot massage. Since they aren’t really a ‘thing’ in the US, I didn’t fall in love with them until living in Shanghai. Now, I love a body massage just as much as the next girl, but getting a foot massage is a totally different experience. When you get a body massage, you can’t really do anything else except lay there while the masseuse works out the kinks in your muscles, but during a foot massage, they are only working on your feet and legs, so as you relax in the recliner, you can read and sip tea. It’s heavenly! They begin by soaking your feet in really warm water, followed by a foot scrub. After that, they massage your feet and legs with oil, focusing on pressure points. After the massage, they wrap your legs in hot towels, cleaning off the excess oil. If you haven’t had one, I highly recommend it!

Following my foot massage, I headed up to the lounge on the 38th floor, where I had the most gorgeous view of the sea overlooking the city and the airport. I enjoyed a hot chocolate while taking in the view and watching a movie on Netflix on my iPad.

A few hours later I was feeling peckish, so I headed across the hall to the steakhouse, where literally everyone knows my name (I obviously go there the most) for dinner. As a vegetarian, you might think it’s strange that I love the steakhouse so much, but they have killer salads and sides, plus their fresh baked dinner rolls with salted butter can’t be beat. I ordered up my usual, the iceberg wedge salad and sweet potato gratin, and must have been so hungry that I forgot to take a picture.

On the way home, I had to pull over and snap this picture of the gorgeous sunset. What a relaxing, perfect day!

Heavy Heart

How is this even real? The weight of it seems incomprehensible, yet somehow it’s true. I’ll never again get to hug her neck, belly laugh with her, seek her advice when I need it, go to an Astros game together, or see that smile that lights up a room. You know life is fragile and precious, but until someone you love is suddenly taken away, you don’t grasp the magnitude of it all. When it’s someone else’s aunt, mother, daughter, sister, friend, it’s sad and maybe even tragic, but when she’s your person, it rips your heart open, leaving you gasping for air, unable to believe that she’s really gone. At first, there’s shock and disbelief, a numbness that comes over you. Then the reality of everything settles in on your chest, bringing with it a heaviness you can’t really understand. A dark cloud follows you everywhere, tears falling as rain from your eyes. You try to push the feelings aside and do what you have to do, but your heart’s not really into it and your mind’s somewhere else, a vacant look in your eyes.

I know that as much as I’m hurting, it can’t even compare to the pain that Uncle Mike and Jason are feeling, losing their wife and mom, or how her sisters and brother and parents are feeling. Their whole world has just shattered. I can’t even imagine what that feels like. A month ago, Kathy was healthy and fine, and now she’s gone. This awful virus that has wrecked millions of lives has claimed another one. It’s not fair. She didn’t deserve this. She had so much life left in her, so much left to offer the world.

As I sit here, alone, halfway around the world, all I want to do is be with my family. While I know there’s nothing I can do to bring her back and nothing I can do to make it better, I wish I could cry with them, hug them, spend time with them, and let them know I love them. When someone dies, you are more aware of the importance of family and togetherness. In these current times, it’s much harder to be away from home. I hope they know how much I love them and wish I could be with them.

Feeling it today

uncertainty breeds fear
the unknown
makes you question
what’s the right thing
to do

when you’re not given
accurate information
or it’s being withheld
anxiety sets in

should i stay
or go
what would keep me
safe

over two weeks of
isolation
no end in sight
loneliness
a new way of life

the need
for human contact
growing stronger each day
all i need is
a hug