Today is my last Tuesday in China. Wow. The countdown is serious now. With less than a week until my departure, I’m starting to slightly freak out. I’m not ready to go. Not physically for sure. Haven’t yet mailed anything to Albania. Haven’t finished packing. Haven’t done my last minute shopping. Haven’t finished all my work at school. Haven’t sold all my stuff yet. Haven’t gone to the bank. Haven’t run the random errands I need to do. There’s never enough time, is there?
I’m also not emotionally ready to go. Haven’t spent enough time with my friends I’m going to miss dearly. Haven’t spent enough time with my students. Haven’t been to all the restaurants I want to visit one last time. Haven’t seen everything I want to see in Shangers. Haven’t had time to properly say goodbye and process what it’s going to be like to leave my life of five years behind and begin again.
But the thing about deadlines and scheduled flights is that even if you’re not ready, you have to go. The sand in my hourglass is pouring out faster than I’d like, and I just have to take it one day at a time. I’m trying to strike a balance between the have to’s and the want to’s. I know I’m going to leave things unfinished and I know I’m going to have regrets, but I’m going to do my best to soak it all in and surround myself with the people I love in my last few days.
Shangers has been good to me (most of the time), and I’m forever grateful for this experience. The people I’ve met, experience I’ve gained, and places I’ve traveled during my time here have helped shape who I am, so for better or worse, Shangers will always be in my heart.
I ❤ Shanghai!